Paris Hilton may be many things (a socialite, reality star, purveyor of party anthems), but she is no chef.
Unless you like your lasagne dry, salty and flavourless with rogue long blonde hairs in it, that is.
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The 38-year-old Stars Are Blind singer has caused quite the stir with her latest venture – a YouTube cooking show which launched this week.
“Cooking with Paris” sees the Hilton heiress awkwardly navigating her way around a kitchen she admits she’s never cooked in before, attempting to make lasagne in a manner to make even the most basic home cooks cringe, while complaining about it the entire time.
In other words, it may be the best cooking show we’ve ever seen – complete with the star uttering “that’s hot” as she checks to see if the stove is on.
While a list of ingredients briefly appears on the left side of the screen, Hilton doesn’t provide any measurements or quantities, forgetting to include onion and garlic and seemingly boiling a packet of pasta sheets for well over 10 minutes.
“As you all know — well, maybe not all of you know — people who do know, know that I’m an amazing cook,” she begins, holding a chihuahua in the same pair of leather gloves she keeps on to shred mozzarella, arrange pasta sheets in a dish and constantly push her hair back from her face.
At one point, she uses a soup ladle to stir an obscene amount of ricotta cheese, before dousing a pan of mince and her entire cooktop in salt which she then attempts to dab off with a piece of paper towel, shortly after plucking a strand of her own hair from the meat.
There are several iconic moments throughout the 15-minute video.
At one point, Hilton marvels over the many different cheeses available to buy while rifling through a drawer looking for something other than a ladle or knife to stir her ricotta.
“There’s like so many different types,” she says. “It’s not normal, but it’s cool.”
She later says: “Lasagne is like very hard to make — well, actually I don’t think it is, but people think it is, but it’s actually really fun and really easy,” while putting her mass of meat and cheese in the oven while wearing what she calls “mittens” to handle the cold dish.
“But I guess it is a lot of steps compared to making toast or something.”
She’s not wrong.
On Twitter, fans are strangely in awe of the video:
But in the comments section on the video, people weren’t so kind.
“I’m so concerned about her lack of hand-washing wearing those gloves,” one said.
“Lol I can’t tell if this is real or she’s joking and just parodying herself,” another added.
“She can’t cook and she breathes like a cow,” one harsh viewer weighed-in.